Dr. Shimi Kang’s Blog

Empower the future. Cultivate drive. Understand your mind.

Recent Articles

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What to Watch for as We Transition Out of the Pandemic’s Acute Phase (Part Two)

Life after a pandemic is new territory for all of us, and it’s essential to recognize the many things that could be coming up for everyone. In this way, we can go forward into this new phase with compassion, understanding, and empathy. Part one of this blog post discussed hyper sociability, social anxiety post-pandemic, and germaphobia.

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What to Watch for as We Transition Out of the Pandemic’s Acute Phase (Part One)

Are you feeling excited about being able to attend school without masks and social bubbles? Perhaps you’re counting the days until you can attend a music festival or go travelling without worry. As we transition out of the acute phase of the pandemic, everything is looking up — right?

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Workplace Bullying: A Real Issue That Needs a Real Solution

Tigertown is a pushing, demanding, and stifling workplace. The hours are long, the management is predatory, the employees are solitary, and there is little community — definitely no mentors, and no time for fun or collegial bonding. Tigertown is an incubator for an insidiously growing problem: workplace bullying.

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For the Sake of Our Kids’ Mental Health, We Must Teach Them to Innovate

“Sam” – whose real name I’m not using to protect his privacy – was a first-year college student when he was referred to me. He was taking English and music, and he had slashed his arms with the bow of his violin. He told me it was not a suicide attempt but rather a protest against his childhood.

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Why We Need Social and Emotional Learning in Schools

When “Tyler” was a child, he was anxious. He may have inherited his tendency to worry from his mom, who was obsessed with “what ifs” and what others thought. Or maybe it was his father, who pushed him hard in school and extracurricular activities. Whatever the case, his parents often tried to solve his problems for him, which greatly diminished his ability to cope with adversity as an adolescent.

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Why Parents Need to Talk to Their Kids About Porn

As a psychiatrist specializing in teens and young adults, I bear witness to an alarming and insidious toxin that has increased in potency over the 15 years of my practice: online pornography. Though often dismissed as harmless, pornography has had a devastating impact on the well-being of many of my patients, and it can affect a person’s mental, physical and social health.

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Anxiety and the Importance of Play

My personal mission is to spread the message that a balanced lifestyle with enough play, social connection, and downtime is vital for human health. My work as a psychiatrist and research in addiction and motivation combined with my experiences as a mom of three kids – ages six, nine, and 11 – led me to this goal. I’m the current medical director of child and youth mental health for the city of Vancouver, and clinical associate professor at the University of British Columbia.

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How To Set, Achieve And Sustain Goals

Most of us have probably been there. You say to yourself “today is when I finally stop putting things off” or “this is when I shed those extra pounds.” Perhaps it was, “I’m going to stop buying those things I don’t need and climb out of debt” or “quit smoking” or even “wasting time on the Internet.” We start off with the best intentions and feel committed when we set these goals for an improved self, or else we probably wouldn’t bother.

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Superficial and Sexual Stereotypes

Sex and gender are clearly common topics for societal issues. Unfortunately, it is not always a positive conversation. Signs of a hypersexual, gender-stereotyped culture clearly pop out with a quick scan of recent news headlines. We see gender insults in the current presidential campaign, deep concern about the presence of rape culture on college campuses, judicial blocking of gender-neutral bathrooms in schools, and backlash to the UN’s appointment of Wonder Woman as the honorary ambassador for women and girls.

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Online Pornography And Sexual Imagery Hurts Young Minds

Just a few weeks earlier, Jesse was excited to start grade five and share with his friends all the good stories he had from summer camp and playing baseball. But this past week, Jesse’s father noticed his son’s behaviour was changing quite dramatically. Usually eager to share what he was learning in math and science, Jesse gave a simple shrug of his shoulders and said, “It was pretty boring to be honest, Mom” when asked how the class science experiment went.

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3 Science-Based Strategies For A Successful School Year

With the official end of summer and start of school, come changes to routines, new schedules, and certain adjustments. This sudden change of pace for families can sometimes leave parents feeling like they are performing a difficult juggling act!

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An Evidence-Based Approach Can Put An End To Bullying

The Roman playwright Terence once said, “I am human, and nothing of that which is human is alien to me.” If everyone shared and behaved according to this empathetic belief, bullying certainly wouldn’t be as prevalent as it is. With 14 per cent of U.S. students (PDF) reporting being bullied and five per cent bullying others in 2014, bullying is a regular affair both inside and outside schools.

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How the Wealthy are Disadvantaged

Some things only money can buy — better access to education, health care, and security, not to mention iPhones, BMWs and exotic vacations.

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We Need to Get Our Kids Outside

Summer, where did you go? It seems like I blinked and all of a sudden your alarm clock free mornings, warm beach days, and carefree weekends were instantly gone.

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Law Does NOT Treat ADHD but Medical Intervention Does

Deputy Kevin Sumner, working as a school resource officer at Latonia Elementary School in Covington, has been sued by American Civil Liberties Union (ACLU) for allegedly handcuffing an 8-year-old boy with ADHD, by his biceps at the back, because the wrists were too small, as a part of punishment given for not complying with orders. ACLU’s Disability Counsel, Susan Mizner has said that using physical punishment for the purpose of disciplining students with disabilities “only serves to traumatize children.” Physical punishment could also further aggravate their behavioral issues Mizner added.

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Going on Holiday May Save Our Minds and Our Economy

Who killed summer vacation? That’s the million dollar question — literally. Long gone are the days of casually taking a few weeks off with the family to go on a road trip, or jetting off to a remote destination where the real world ceases to exist.

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The Way You’re Talking To Your Teen About Dress Codes Is All Wrong

A couple weeks ago, I was invited by CBC Radio to speak about a rather controversial topic brewing amongst parents and their teens regarding teenage clothing choices. This subject was recently spotlighted after a 17-year-old high school senior in Moncton, New Brunswick, made a statement by wearing a full-length halter dress against school policy, exposing her shoulders (including both bra straps), to which she was told by the school’s vice principal to cover up. In response, the subject wrote a three-page letter voicing her feelings about the hyper-sexualization of females in society and most notably states that if a boy at her school gets distracted by her back, he should be “…sent home and practice self-control.”

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Finding and Keeping Your Mother’s Intuition

Have you ever felt that fluttering feeling in your stomach? The kind that rises up into your chest and makes your heart race and even though you couldn’t possibly have any idea why you’re feeling that way, all you know is that the decision you’re about to make feels either very right or extremely wrong? Those feelings and that reaction in your body are based on human intuition. And the impulse to act on your intuitions, are based on your instincts.

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How do we nurture adaptability, resilience and self-motivation in our children?

Laura was a first year university student when I met her in the hospital emergency room. She had slashed up her arms with the bow of her violin. She told me it was not a suicide attempt, but rather an act of desperation to cope with her feelings of exhaustion and anxiety. As a child, Laura was a star student excelling in academics and music, and she spent a lot of time in those activities. Laura’s mother solved many of her problems for her and protected her from everyday stresses, such as doing chores, because she didn’t want to interfere with Laura’s success in winning awards and medals. Things changed around the age of 16, when Laura began to have trouble with a curriculum that required critical thinking, creativity and collaborative group projects. Once in university, things became much worse and Laura admitted to me that she slashed her arms after she cheated in an English assignment that she was at risk of failing.

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Stress Is Wreaking Havoc on Women and Their Bodies

In honour of April’s Stress Awareness month, I wanted to take this time to touch upon a subject that many women of the 21st century are struggling with in silence, day after day, whether they are aware of it or not. During this month, many experts in all fields of health will come together in hopes of spreading awareness and increasing public understanding of this growing issue that is seemingly harmless and often overlooked. Because for many of us, we may not realize its creeping effects on our health until we fall extremely ill, or it is too late.

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Stress and the Gender Gap

In honour of April’s Stress Awareness month, I wanted to take this time to touch upon a subject that many women of the 21st century are struggling with in silence, day after day, whether they are aware of it or not. During this month, many experts in all fields of health will come together in hopes of spreading awareness and increasing public understanding of this growing issue that is seemingly harmless and often overlooked. Because for many of us, we may not realize its creeping effects on our health until we fall extremely ill, or it is too late. And in an increasingly complex and competitive world where studies have shown that women are more affected by this today and in bigger numbers than ever before in history, we need to ask ourselves when is enough, enough? And what can we do about it?

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Workplace Bullying: A Real Issue That Needs a Real Solution

Tigertown is a pushing, demanding, and stifling workplace. The hours are long, the management is predatory, the employees are solitary, and there is little community — definitely no mentors, and no time for fun or collegial bonding. Tigertown is an incubator for an insidiously growing problem: workplace bullying.

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Why Immigrant Kids Excel: They are NOT Tiger Parented

Let’s be serious. Most immigrant parents do not have the time, money, resources, or will to be over-controlling, hovering, tiger parents.

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Figure out which type of parenting style suits you and your family best

We are raising our children in an era of dangerous paradox. We are the most educated group of parents to walk the earth, yet our children stand a much higher chance of developing serious conditions such as stress, insomnia, anxiety, depression, obesity, diabetes and addiction. While all of these problems also have roots in our genes, the fact that they are all on the rise in children has nothing to do with DNA and everything to do with the imbalanced modern lifestyles in which we are raising our children. A lack of balance plagues the everyday lives of so many children. If our children spend too much time working at a desk and not enough time living in the real world, they won’t learn how to balance work and real life in adulthood. If our children spend too much time studying or practising and not enough time resting or unwinding, they’ll have a hard time being able to relax. If our children spend too much time being protected, they won’t learn how to protect. The dolphin doctrine themselves. If our children are given too much instruction and not enough time to problem-solve on their own, they’ll have a hard time facing and solving their own problems. A child who grows up imbalanced won’t even know what balance feels like. With the goal of balance in mind, let’s look at the three classic parenting styles through the metaphor of the tiger, jellyfish and dolphin.

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Overscheduling Your Kids Isn’t the Fast-Track to Success it Once Was

“I know it doesn’t feel right but everyone else is doing it.” These were the words I said far too often a few years ago when I was a new parent. It seemed to be the only response I could muster up when a well-meaning grandparent or friend (with no kids) commented on how busy we were as a family because of all my kids’ activities.

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What’s a ‘Dolphin Parent’? Psychiatrist Decodes Parenting Styles

‘Helicopter parenting’ has become synonymous with parents who hover too much, but what are Tiger, Jellyfish and Dolphin parents? Dr. Shimi Kang defines the animal metaphors associated with parenting styles.

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As a best-selling author, international speaker, and expert contributor to prominent media outlets, Dr. Shimi Kang has influenced how millions of people approach self-development and mental health. Understand innovation and achievement, book Dr. Shimi Kang as a keynote speaker, a media appearance, or a medical consultation & empowerment coaching today!

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